How do you ask someone to not be in your wedding?
Thats something I've been struggling with (and subsequently avoiding). Long story short, I got caught up in "I cant wait to be in the wedding (pause) I am in the wedding, right?." Now, random wedding guests I can manage. People trying to tell me what I should do for my wedding: I can manage. But I was caught totally off guard with that one. And what did I say? Like a softy? Yes. I told her yes ya'll!
But I didnt mean yes. Not really. I didnt want to hurt her feelings, but I've known with a fair degree of certainty for some time now who was on the bridesmaid list, who were the possibles, and who didnt make the cut. She hadnt made the cut. And since I havent been engaged that long, I dont know how attached she is to the idea of being in the wedding. I dont think she's ever been in one. And I know thats not a reason to keep her in mine. Not that I dont love her dearly. I do love her, and I know she'd be fun to have around. In fact, I'd planned to have her around - but as a hostess and not a 'maid.
I digress.
So as I sit here and type this, I'm trying to construct the most ginger way to address the issue. Will her feelings be hurt? Maybe. Will I get some backlash? Maybe. Am I doing this without running it by mom? Yes. Of course Jase is on board, but still. I've gotten the support I'm going to get on this one, knowing full well that me asking around is just another stalling technique. I know what I need to do. And I know when I look back on my wedding, I dont want to automatically associate her with being part of the bridal party out of obligation.
Maybe I'll just call her tomorrow :(
On a brighter note, I'm going to start the big checklist. Should be fun, right? And I've been divying out marching orders for the crew. Dani has a task, Jase has a few tasks (lol), and I'm going to give Krissi one relatively soon. I also have something that will be perfect for Dr. Hunt, and MJ is already asking me about going dress shopping. Things are really coming along :)
My stomach is growling, so I need to go find some vitals. Adi!
6.04.2008
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